What Do People Forget to Do Before They Die?

Cremation services offered at funeral homes in Wirtz, VA. But before we die and before we are cremated, we often forget to do some very necessary things related to death unless we know death is around the corner or we’ve been diagnosed with an illness that will result in death. 

The first thing that we forget to do is to use the words “dying,” “death,” and “dead.” Western culture is full of euphemistic references to these words. They can include phrases like, “going home,” “passing on,” “passed away,” “slipped away,” “departed,” “left this world,” “succumbed,” and “entered eternal rest.” 

By avoiding using the words dying, death, and dead, we also avoid talking about the things surrounding them, which includes our end-of-life wishes and our desires for our funeral arrangements. We don’t specify what we want and what we don’t want so our loved ones know and we don’t take the necessary steps to create legally-binding documents that define how we want to die, what should happen when we die, and what we want done after we die. 

Another thing we forget to do before we die is to have end-of-life conversations with our health providers. It can be surprising how uncomfortable these conversations can be for people whose training includes managing and handling the end of life. Perhaps the Hippocratic Oath, which includes the phrase, “do no harm,” is one reason why health care providers avoid talking about death. 

Some health care providers may go as far as denying death when it’s staring them in the face, and will refuse to help make plans for death when it’s obvious that it will happen sooner rather than later.   

However, no matter how much you may like your health care provider and how good the relationship has been, if they refuse to discuss death with you as part of your health care (this can include providing Do Not Resuscitate (DNR) and Do Not Intubate (DNI) orders, as well as helping with advance directives), or they can’t bring themselves to admit that you’re facing death in the near future, you need to find a health care provider who will do these things. 

We don’t like to educate ourselves about unpleasant things, which we’ve come to believe death is. This lack of education is part of what feeds our fear about death, because we don’t really know what happens, what choices we have, and what we can do to make sure important aspects surrounding our deaths are done the way we want. 

So, we don’t prepare for death before we die. As a result, we’re totally unprepared when it actually happens. 

Another thing that people don’t do before they die is to thing about the legacy they want to leave behind after their deaths. There are things that we keep to ourselves, perhaps never talking about, that are important to who we are as people and what we would like to be perpetuated in the generations that survive us. 

Creating a legacy in writing gives us the opportunity to share the things, the values, and the wisdom that we believe is most important for our families to know and live by after we die, instead of assuming that they do or will automatically know. 

For additional information about cremation services in Wirtz, VA, our caring and knowledgeable staff at Lynch Conner-Bowman Funeral Home can assist you. You can visit our location at 140 Floyd Ave., Rocky Mount, VA, 24151, or you can call us today at (540) 483-5533 for more personalized services.